where are you going my infancy

Childhood is an age that comes again and again in everyone's life. As I believe it comes into existence on a large scale once when you start feeling that it is ending that is on growing adult and another at the closing chapter of life. Even a so serious teenage growing adult sometimes converts himself into a baby and do something weird. I think the mentality that works behind all this is the feeling of flood off of childhood. At that time the sadness inside about non existence of adolescent inside in the future reacts in the form of hoodwink expressions, becouse after an age you have to move strictly with time and with much pressure on shoulders. That happens to every normal teenage. They sometime start talking like infants extreemly; asking foolish question is a common thing (watch out your peers).

k.........let me yell the fact why I am writing this post in such way. Because all that is happening to me currently. Once was the age when I used to collect the garbage things to convert them in something very eye-catching objects. my imagination always worked in accordance with me. I was about 12-13.I used to take some wild plants from the river flowing near my village and then to see them growing up with small flowers...............that takes only few weeks for those plants. we used to play that"posan pa posan pa"[;)],"ladai ladai(which many time turned real)" games, n after all cricket and kabaddi too. I used to come home with my dirty school dress everyday and then directly reach to playground ( street in front of my house that was not cemented by that time). some time even mother took tea for me in street…………….. that were unforgettable moments!!. I did usually play cricket up to 6-7 at evening and then LUKKA CHIPPI, POLICE CHOR type things as electricity cut (even in present) after 6-7 pm my village many times. And yes I can’t forget that gliding of my heart for that girl of my class at sixth standard……..my first love and still my mentor for life.

Ultimately now when I am on the edge of my childhood, I again started to behaving in insane way. The most what has influenced my thought is my pear group. I used to read about pear pressure many years back and made my mind to not including in any group. I was living an independent lonely life but now I know that you can’t break away from it. I think childhood games can’t be back........not that first love.....not that river (as it is now deserted ) . but I now a day trying my hard to live all that reminiscences one more time so that I would be able to keep all those memories stronger at 75 not only for my grandchildren but also to live them as much as possible again by that time to............

deeply yours,
param